Category Archives: Funny

Goofy, off-the-wall or silly things I might find or think.

Five Lies You Will Never Hear My Mother Tell About Me

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This post came to me from nowhere.  My mom is not inclined to lie about me.  But it seems funny to me now to write this:

  1. Randy was always clean and organized, his room was always tidy, I never had to remind him
  2. Randy has always been a good manager of his money, he never spent his money frivolously on baseball cards
  3. Randy never said anything embarrassing with his mouth such as calling his grandmother fat
  4. Randy was such a mild-mannered child and always obeyed
  5. Randy always finished things he was supposed to do, like homework, chores and writing thank you cards

The truth is that I was a pig until I finally moved out and then I was still a pig until we had people over, then we figured out that my pigginess was probably a bad thing.  I’ve never been a good manager of money and am now reaping the rewards of that.  I’ve said so many stupid things in my life its just amazing I’m still alive.  I’ve had a strong opinion about everything, except for politics and religion.  I would disobey my mom like crazy, but my dad had me good & scared 🙂 [ok, not that scared].  I never finished many, many things, the last big thing I never finished was my parent’s house getting painted.  I owed them money for a small car accident (the other car was small compared to the Suburban), when my brother bought the house from my parents… he wasn’t happy with me either 🙂

Rewarded

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Today I was skyping with my brother (as in video chatting) and we ended up talking about computers.  I must be totally rewarded (as in r*tard*d) because I ended up explaining to him why his next computer should be an Apple.  Yes, they’re great, but in the end I should have talked with him about something besides computer.  My relationship with him as a brother goes back far enough that we should get beyond 0’s and 1’s 🙂

Funniest Cruise Story Ever!

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My old boss (and sort of boss now that I’m a contractor for the same company) wrote about his latest cruise – he’s still on it – but its been painfully stupid.  You can read about it here.

I would encourage you to leave a comment of your own cruise experience if you’ve been on one because it’ll surely be read by others who find this post amusing!

Jonesing for Indy

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Today I saw my first photo of the Indiana star Harrison Ford in his getup for the next movie to be released next year.  I loved  the Indiana Jones movies growing up.  Harrison Ford was such a super-hero without the actual baggage of having super powers.  In other words he was so real life that I actually thought I could grow up to be a computer programmer.  Wait, no, I actually thought I could grow up to fight Nazis and bad guys in general while being concerned with archeology.  As it turns out I’m concerned with Archeology for Biblical reasons, but not for Nazi-fighting or actual digging.

Jonesing for Indy

Oh, and I’m glad I’m not a professor, but I’m glad I get to teach a Bible Study and sometimes Sunday School.  Those are teaching of a type I can handle.  I’m really, really glad that the ladies in those classes don’t write, “I love you,” on their eye lids.  Ha!

Slight Site Tweak

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For the few of you that read this blog within a browser and not through RSS, I’ve made a small number of changes that should hopefully help you.

  • I’ve set the categories to indent so that its easier to find categories that are of the sub nature
  • I’ve added a small blog-roll. I’ve got more sites that I track, but these come recommended for general readership (more will be added over time)
  • I’ve removed the archives. I have archives dating back to about the time that Cortez was sailing around looking for West Indians to kill with disease, swords and social networks.

A lesser known fact is that the Pordcast has moved to https://randypeterman.com/thepordcast/. Since its not active at the moment that’s not a huge loss. I do plan to resurrect it in the next few months with a new series on finances. Something that I know far too little about but plan on exploring and sharing with you what I find. As long as its not West Indians with socialized medicine and a penchant for corn roasted over bat guano.

Creators Syndicate: An Old Model Shows Off Its Old Assets

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I just got an email from Creators Syndicate this morning.  Some woman (I’m assuming its a woman) by the name of Andrea Fryrear (which is an unfortunate last name if you break it up as a compound word) sent me an email (with a from name of only ‘Andrea’ which is a good way to get tagged as spam Ms. Fryrear) asking me to take down a farside cartoon that I had posted on my website.  A single cartoon that I had found on the internet and copied onto my site.  I immediately complied because I want to be a law abiding citizen.  However, I had some questions for her: 1) How could I legally re-use the cartoon (could I pay a license fee) 2) Could I link to a Far Side book on Amazon.com and then the cartoon could potentially be a revenue generating advertisement for them?  I haven’t gotten a reply yet, but the whole thing bugged me.

Gary Larson apparently has written about the subject and you can read about it on the syndicate website.  It strikes me as a problematic solution to the real issue: the interwebs is a new model for publishing businesses and they must deal with the change.  There are tons of ways they could go about making the new model work for them:

1) Require all comics that are republished by independent publishers (like bloggers) link to their site where they sell the books, mugs, shirts, cell phone wrappers, bumper stickers and collectible enema boxes to people who link through

2) Require the images to be linking to amazon.com with their associates ID so that they get to make money on Amazon.com selling their stuff

3) Give it away realizing that the more exposure they have the more likely people will seek out the funny/good content in sources that pay them (such as newspapers, paying websites, and again, Amazon.com)

4) Give it away and just say, “Gee, this interweb thing will hopefully be a passing fad.”

But sitting around hiring people like Andrea (who I am sure is really nice and probably makes a killer vegetarian salad when you come over to her house because she wouldn’t even hurt dead meat) to send out emails and seek out places where their old model is leaking and stick her finges in them is not an ideal method.

A New Story Wherein Randy Smells Like Burning Wood for Days

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So about two (2) weeks ago I saw an episode of Good Eats called ‘Q’.  It was about smoking pork butt (which is actually the pig’s shoulder).  I lost site of any other Fathers Day Weekend (FDW) goals and determined to burn wood at such a slow rate that no flames were detectable, yet smoke would emit from the wood and make the meat and everything within a 15 mile radius smell of smoke.  It worked.  Too well.  The smoked pork with an espresso barbecue sauce was finger-licking-good (without the geriatric chicken guy), but everything still smells smokey.  I was at church, rubbed my nose and “poof!” smoke smell on my skin, in my nostrils and causing me to want to try smoking meat again in the middle of the street with a space suit on.  Then the smokiness of the meat would be less smoked Randy and more smoked flavor on the meat when we bring it in from the smoker.

Good meats 🙂