I’m just full of confessions today. I’m about to confess something that no one else knows right now, so get ready:
my hands smell like Bleu Cheese. I crumbled some on my lunch today and now no matter how many times I wash my hands they still smell like Bleu Cheese. Since I have to go to the dentist Monday I’m considering taking a large bite of that and some fresh red onion so that I may set a new record for the stinkiest breath ever to be blown in the face of a dentist’s face [that’s a joke, I love dentist, or so I keep telling myself]. I figure that it will match the condition of my teeth in general: poor. I haven’t been to the dentist in some time because frankly I don’t trust them. Not that all dentists are untrustworthy, but that the dentist I went to last seemed so shady that I couldn’t go back and have the tooth drilled and filling installed. The guy’s office was so creepy that I couldn’t handle it.

Worse still the job I had before Alt-N was at a dental supply place that put me in contact with a lot of shifty individuals. Pretty much all dentists fall under two categories for me, the honest and the crazy, cheap, that may be a cavity so lest fill it just in case variety. Sure, I’m a pessimist when it comes to this sort of ‘medicine’ but I’d much rather go to a chiropractor and have them adjust my molars. Of course that won’t help with cavities, but I wonder if they could do that instead of going to an orthodontist. Probably not but it would make for a great movie. Much better than Ballistic anyway.

OK, I’m going to go wash my hands again.