OK, so we’re out of Cheez-Its. This is not insurmountable because I can easily shred some cheese onto graham crackers and throw them into our toaster oven. It doesn’t quite taste the same but sometimes you just have to make due. I find that cheesy cinnamon graham crackers are tasty, but not quite as good as other forms of biscuits with cheese. Abby finally had to get a knife out and hold me up for the last of the Goldfish crackers. It’s getting pretty bad… I think I need help.

If I could only find a way to just stop snorting the powder from the bottom of the Cheez-It bag I think I’d be OK. The worst problem with this is that it coagulates in my nasal passage and I find myself coughing up ‘cheezburgers’ every once in a while. I think I can stop if I could just switch over to rye-krisps or wasa bread. I hear that other cracker-heads have been able to get off of crackers all together and just form habits with safer substances like french bread, ice berg lettuce or sunflower seeds. Its mostly the habit of putting the crackers in my mouth and getting the crunch sensation so I’m pretty sure that if I find another source of crunch I’ll be off Scott Peterson Free. Wait, no, he’s not free. Dang, these glutenous goodies are going to do me in.