We went to swimming lessons again this morning and I learned something very important: don’t suck water into your mouth when attempting to breathe while doing the ‘Free Style’ stroke. Apparenlty sucking water into your mouth during other strokes is acceptable. I also learned that the ‘Back Stroke’ is not a massage technique and that it too requires some finesse. As you know I’m loaded with finesse so the swimming came quite easily to me. I was like a duck out of hell water there in that pool.

Apparently my old war injury in my shoulder makes it so that when I bring my left arm around something that resembles a really out of balance tire happens. There is no circle, it’s more like a wobbly limb waving around like a wobbly limb. I suppose it’s better than waving around like a wobbly lamb, but not much better. I was able to get the back stroke down all right after several laps. Unfortunately I’m so tired right now that the word plays above were actually funny to me. I suppose this is a good thing since my desk-jockey life involves as much exercise as that of a person who watches TV all day.

Next week we’re apparently going to be tackling the butterfly stroke. As graceful as that stroke is I’m sure that it’s going to look like I’m tackling it. On the football field. In swimming trunks. Wearing no goggles because the only good ones cost more than I’m willing to part with for the short duration of this class. Of course if I want to make the money we paid for this class useful I’m going to have to continue on with my swimming. I guess we’ll have to buy a house with a pool or a really, really, really big toilette.