While it is a little early to tell how the United States Olympic teams will fair, their lack of Olympic Medals is causing some concern. Many Democrats are blaming Bush and the War on Terrorism. A John Kerry representative was quoted as saying:

“Obviously the teams are unable to employ good 'stratigery' due to the distraction of Iraq being so close geographically.”

President Bush or one of his administrative aides were not available for comment.

Olympic officials were glad to see athletes Dollars from other countries competing to show the United States that the sporting community is able to support top-dollar pharmaceutical companies in their search for performance enhancing drugs supplements.

Ticket sales at the Olympic events has been lower than people expected since according to television anchor Bob Costas, “Most of Greece is on a religious holiday and that’s why Olympic ticket sales are down.” Other authorities say ticket sales were down because 1) the Olympics aren’t that cool anymore when compared to the X-Games 2) Attendance was up at Bible Study meetings at hooters and 3) priceline.com was running specials to go see the “Elvis is Alive Museum” guided by William Shatner.